Life lessons

Wow, so last night i really realized that i let someone whom i trusted and thought was a good person manipulate me. They pulled me and pushed me around for a while, and i thought it was all for the better. I didn't see anything really wrong with it at the time, because i didn't feel pushed or pulled into any certain direction. I felt accepted, i felt wanted, i felt like a person that i hadn't ever felt like before. It was wonderful, it was great and i was happy, until last night..... when things really clicked. I really realized at that moment what i had just put myself through, and how i allowed myself to be treated. I severed a great relationship with another friend, whom i had known longer because of this person. I let myself be torn apart and made into someone i never thought i would be. I had a great friendship with someone who cared about me, who cared about what i said. He accepted me as me, and he was always there when i needed him even if he was in another town. I smashed all of this, for someone who i thought was like that, but ended up not being that person at all... they bashed this friend that i ended a friendship with, they told me multiple times that i wasn't hurting them at all, when in fact, i was hurting them more and more everyday. Last night i cried and cried and cried because i could not believe i let someone do that to me, i let someone come into my life and change who my friends were. I cannot believe it has taken me this long to realize this, but i am extremely happy that i did finally come to my senses, and that this old friend was there for me to go to and accept my apology! I vow to anyone and everyone, that i WILL NOT allow ANYONE to come between a friendship i already have, the friendships i have are here for a reason, and if they are suppose to be broken, then it will happen for reasons that are not because i have gained a new friend.... or so i thought.

Nick and I have reconciled our differences as of tonight. I wrote him a 3 page apology stating everything has happened between Zachary and I and how i changed and how i have realized what a horrible person i am for ever letting him come between us. Nick has been there for me through thick and thin, he has helped me with everything imaginable and i cannot believe one friendship ended that. I am extremely upset about that but i am so glad that he has forgiven me, although it will take time for everything to increase again and it will never be like it was before, but it sure will be close and that is all i ask for!

I want everyone to know that i will never allow that to happen again, and i have learned so many lessons, more then i ever thought possible with one mistake!